What I wouldn't give if real truth in advertising were required! It might would stay many from ever being a jenny's better half. But then, there'd still be the masses who think "That's not me."
I'm sorry. Forgot to tell you this is a rant about alcohol. I'm sick and tired of watching people I know and love swirl down the toilet bowl of life. I'm worn from seeing them slap each other on the backs as they laugh and slide straight into hell on earth. And I'm especially sick of their hell bleeding over into my little slice of paradise.
The advertisements show beautiful people, smiling, laughing, hooking up; drinking until they just get a blush of gaiety about them. Then they warn you to drink responsibly and never drive drunk. They have obviously never met a drunk person. Albeit some will drink to a drunken state quite on purpose. Many even. But there are also many who drink, enjoying themselves and then just sort of find, BAM! - I'm drunk. And Hollywood has done it's fair share of promoting drunks as cute, funny, adorable critters who quietly fall asleep when given the chance. They also never met a drunk.
Well, I've been married into the work hard, play harder mentality that dominates these woods for soon 23 years. And I've lived in the heart of them for the past 9 years. And I'm here to tell you what you'd see if advertising were true.
- You'd see men and women chugging down a half a case or more a piece in one evening.
- You'd see best friends, brothers and even sisters come to blows with one another over some perceived (or misconceived rather) wrong they felt was inflicted upon them.
- You'd see people who never even thought of hitting the road until after they were inebriated.
- You'd know that a struggle to keep keys away from one could be just as deadly as allowing one to drive.
- You'd see ladies puke all over their newest boots and splatter all over their Rocky Mountain jeans.
- You'd find men that floated away in a sea of their own piss as they slept in their drunken stupor.
- You'd know that women and children were pulled, pushed or flat out hit for asking a question, not asking a question, being up at that time, not being up at that time.
- There would be fools tearing up their own possessions in fits of drunken rage.
- You'd find missed work days so they could recuperate from their most recent self inflicted illness.
- You'd hear them wonder why their health was failing and their relationships never seemed to last.
- You see families suffer financially while stiff fines and penalties were paid for the household drunk.
- Once the tabs start popping, nothing matters except that there is another can in the cooler and that they realize they are low before the "beer store" closes.
These are generalities. They are taken from real stories and experiences. Some of which would curl your hair.
Come on Miller Lite, Bud, Coors and the rest! I dare you. I double dog dare you to tell the truth!!!!!!
Who wants a beer?